Welcome to my Mhine...

Saturday, January 21, 2006

The Da Vinci Code Movie poster and trailer



The Da Vinci Code Movie trailer

Thursday, November 17, 2005

Why do men have nipples?

Was browsing through New York times top 5 bestseller for the month when I spotted the title at number 2 on the paperback advice list. Why do men have nipples? Was kinda surprise as I had stumbled upon the book at Kinokuniya a few months back and never though it could become such a best-seller. Nonetheless the title captured my attention and I had it off the shelf and read a few pages.

Generally the book tackle all the whacky medical questions that all of us (I assume) had wondered about but were too embarressed to ask our GP. Questions as stated in the title, what really happened to the contact lens that got stuck behind our eyelids, are fart really flammable? Whether masturbation causes blindness ( had never tried before so I don't know). Personally I will like to know how babies are made =b. Although interesting I never went on to purchase the book, Kinokuniya books are just too expensive... Now that it had made the bestseller list, can consider getting it from Popular coz they have 20% off all bestsellers!

Clark "Hey Lana... about my research on nipples... Now that I've shown you mine... can I check out yours?"

Monday, November 07, 2005

Business Prospect 2 - Problems with Multi-Level Marketing (MLM)

"Come on Les... Don't be so skeptical of mlm. Listen to be before coming to a conclusion."

"Of coz I'm lah... Cb if u're doing decent business why ask me to come over here without telling me the real reason... I felt so cheated." I thought but since I'm already here and give you a bit of face and listen to you lah... Than maybe can analyse and see what's wrong.

"1st of all let me ask you Leslie... If you starts a cafe business. You will invite your friends and relatives. Hoping they will be your 1st customer right... You will hope that from them they bring along their friends introduce them to your cafe... From word of mouth, they will help you spread the name of your business far and wide. This is exactly how mlm works, you can't say that you're cheating your friends and family right."

Wrong!
Problem no. 1... If they come to my cafe. They have a choice of what they want... I wouldn't force them to order the most expensive coffee. In a mlm scheme I got absolutely no choice but to purchase a product I might not even need.

Problem no. 2... If the product is so good why doesn't the organisation sell it on a customary marketing system that has being so successful in human history? Why don't you just try to sell it to me directly, straight to the point. Companies like Macdonalds or Coca-Cola don't sell their products through mlm. Is the product just a cover in the mlm scheme to exploit others?

Problem no.3. In the real econamic world of demand and supply, companies plan the amount of supply to be introduce into the market to meet the demand. In a mlm, how is anyone able to calculate the amount to be produce to meet the supply? If 10ok of product A is produce and the mlm salespeople is only able to generate only 50k people to join their scheme, this may be the end of the company. This a problem of over-saturation. If the company collapse who am I to look for? Limpei got study economics 1 ok... Wana bluff me go read more books lah.

"Now we go into how this whole system works like a pyramid. You just look for 4 people and bring them up here. I can do the rest and show you the ropes. Say if you get 4 people in 2 weeks. Coz I believe you have a large social network. On getting them you'll get $400 paycheck per month. After you get the 4, they'll help you find another 4 each. Each averaging another 2 weeks. If you're able to succeed till this stage you'll be able to be promoted to a manager level and getting $1200 monthly. In a matter of 1 month. It's really simple trust me."

Problem no. 4. Lanjiao! If really so simple the company will be larger than the GNP of the entire Singapore liao! The reason why it still isn't is because there are suckers out at the bottom of the pyramid who will fail. So mlm a design to profit of people who buy into the exact idea that the mlm salesman is selling! So mlm is a con business! They are exploitative and dishonest!

"Look at all these top managers... All of them are earning tens of thousands every month. All of them are driving the lastest BMW series using the transport allowance by the company for all top sales people... Don't you wana be like them? If not think about your parents. Don't you wana provide them with a good life as well?
I could had gotten a BMW if I wanted but couldn't as I am an army regular and it's illegal to have other job outside."

Problem no. 5. Lanjiao again! You so rich smoking Viceroy! Wana bullshit remember to wipe the bulls backside lah... If this really is a legitimate opportunity, why not focus on the market, product or service instead of people reveling in lavish materialism? Think about it.

"There are two kinda people in this world... No. 1 is someone who thinks they can make money without any output. The second type is the kind that is sensible and knows that it takes money to make more money... Over here you are required to pay for the product and attend some seminars. After which you get four people over here. So when can you start?"

"Start ki lan ah!"
"I don't think I'm able to commit lah Fabian. I'm doing part-time studies."

"Ain't you motivated by the talk? If you don't think about yourself think about your parents. Don't you want to give them a better life?" Fabian retorted.

"I'm busy lah and I gotta go... All the best to you anyway." I hinted that I'm not interested.

"Ok I wouldn't force you... Maybe this line is not suitable for you. Go back to your studies. Maybe after that look for a job. You want me to introduce you 1? I got a friend who has vacancies for wharehouse assistant you interested?"

"CCB trying to take a dig at me ah?"
"Leave the job for someone else Fabian. I don't like working in "filthy" environment. Wharehouse "rooftops" are often dilapidated and not exactly "trustworthy"... May "drop" anytime and crash the people "below". This kinda job only suitable (read exploit) for people who are desparate, out of job or merely foolish." I got up and left.

Problems 6... Mlm stained relationship. Motives change, suspicions rise. It is worth it to have your friends and relatives avoiding you? What goes unnoticed to the MLMers is that trust in him is lose and not easily regain...

Wednesday, November 02, 2005

Business Prospect 1

Went out with my BMT mates on Deepavali. No, not to celebrate the indian festival of lights but for a little gathering... And so I thought...

Jeffrey is my BMT mate he has being trying to ask me out for a couple of time. Rejected him on several occassion already but finally I'm free and thus agreed. He said he had some business plan in mind and ask me out to talk about it, mayb chill out a bit, catch a movie. Fabian another of our BMT friend will be there as well. Ok sounds good right... Wrong!

I ask Benny another of our army buddy along. We meet Jeff at Adam road hawker center and he brought us to a beauty salon located at some shophouse. Jeff claims that Fabian works there and so we waited for him outside.

"Huh? funny why got guy work at beauty salon." I thought.

"Eh Jeff Deepavali you never jio Gunesh out? Last time the indian guy sleep never want underwear one haha. Your buddy leh."

"CB don't say him ah that fucker... Knn jacob's ladder don't dare to climb... Ask him to go up like wana ask him go die like that... Cry untill like a pussy... Make the whole Platoon pumping position wait for him."

Jeff offer me a cigarette as we chatted.

"Hey I never see you smoke during BMT one leh."

"Aiyo bo pian lah... stress man. Now I sign on as a regular liao lagi jialet kena all kind of sai gang..."

"Knn no wander so rich can afford marlboro... Branded hoon ki leh of coz I grab lah whahaha."

Anyway while awaiting Fabian's arrival, I notice alot of smartly dress executive looking guys walking in and out of the shop... I felt abit peculiar, so I ask Jeff what is Fabian doing over there. He told me Fabian is one of the owner of the franchise and that he himself is one as well. Huh... He briefly introduce the place to me and told me that the shop provide facial services downstairs and massage and spa service on the upper level. Fabian will tell me more about the place when he arrives.

"Watfore I wana know more sia... Wana tell me their massage got special ah wahaha." I pondered.
"But canot be mah... This place looks so high class."

Jeff added " Now do charbo business very good one."

"Wow they really got special ah! Hhmm."

While waiting, a guy appeared and told us that Fabian is coming down soon. He introduce himself very politely (deludingly I felt) and ask if we know what we are here for. I told me we came to meet up with Fabian.

"Huh meet him only meh? Ok lah I help you all get him down."

"Meet him only?!?! What does this kuku means?"

I think Benny felt strange as well and turn to ask me.

"Eh les ah... I think something is wrong leh. This place like funny leh and the guy also talk strange strange one leh."

"Ya lah weird huh... so many good looking guys. Fabian works here. Got massage, spa. Jeff mention charbo business... Don't make sense leh..."

I begin to dwell about it for awhile and suddenly something struck me...

"Don't tell me they running gigolo business down here! Do charbo business. I finally got it! Woah ho say liao lah... My first job is to become a manwhore wahaha song lah earn big $$ can shiok somemore WooHoo!!! Second only to my dream of becoming a porn actor in Japan wahahaha... Than like that my client will include the rich and famous... Mayb mediacorp aunties like Zoe Tay. Heard her husband pilot training alway bring him oversea, she must be feeling damn lonely. Or the recently divorced Li Nanxing ex-wife whatthename I forgot. No Nanxing sure down there (goat die le). Haha. Or mayb my favourite Huang Biren!!! Whahahaha song song gao Jurong!"

"Hey les why u ga gi chio ga gi song?" Benny asked.

"Ohoh... nothing lah... Lets ask Jeff what's he's up to ok."
"Hey Jeff we BMT brother one leh... Why you bring us here man?"

At this point Fabian arrived. Jeffrey told us that he will leave the explaining to Fabian.

"Eh how Fabian long time no see ah seem you're doing well."

"Ok lah not bad... But I made a wrong choice in the beginning I go sign-on also... But heng is I found this line good $$. Wana smoke anot?"

Fabian handed me his cigarette.

"Viceroy, cheap brand... Chey." I rejected his offer.

He went on to deliever some pep talks about aspiration and dreams. Ask us about ours and if we would like to make big $$. Well of coz who wouldn't want to right. He went on about all the stuff that we will be able to afford if we make it big. Big car, big house, big big big every BIG things in life.

By this time I was getting impatient. I told him to stop beating about the bush and go straight to the point. I was already dreaming about all the wonderful things that going to happen if I join the world oldest profession, male style.

"Relac leslie we'll talk about it upstairs."

"Ya hor this kinda stuff should be illegal. Better to talk behind closed doors."

After he finish smoking we procreed up to his office.

"Wow not bad huh gigolo now got so big office 1... Deco so nice, got air-con... Hhmm mayb he is the pimp."

Fabian took out a BMW catalogue from his drawer. He showed us all the lastest 5 and 7 series and ask if we'll like to own one. I gaze at it mouth watering...

"Don't tell me they provide BMW for us to chauffeur our client around. Straight outta the movies man!"

"Own BMW? BMX maybe ah ahhaaha." I replied

"Alamak don't like that say mah. Now I'm going to tell you how in a few months time you can own one of this. Jeffrey is already halfway there. I hope I can help you two fulfill your dreams as well."

"Huh? Not immediately have one ah? Hhmm... Maybe gigolo also got hierarchy 1... The newbie take taxi the lao jiao take Mercedes."

"Ok so the purpose of asking you guys here today....... I'm going to share with you the secret to success and earning big bucks in the shortest time possible...... I want to introduce you all to......

MLM - Multi-level marketing."

KNNBCCB!!!

Friday, October 28, 2005

WHAT is it with Singapore girls? We have being hearing them going on and on critising us local guys, how unromantic we are, how immature, how impratical... all these compared to our angmo counterpart. These supposedly "Foreign talent" are deem more sensitive toward the fairer sex, behaves more gentlemanly, more romantic, more more more everythig also more... Even their prick got more meat than ours... But can't u SPGs see the bigger picture. All u bimbos know is "more is good." Knn can't you see they come here steal our job, steal our girls, vandalise our property, come here yaya papaya act sat sat, think they big fuck. Think I should stop here before anyone say I'm racist and charge me with the... what's the word... sedition act ah the lastest IT word on the online community. Of coz not all angmo are as mention above... Most only.

Its not about the expatriate here I wana talk about but female of our society. All they do is critise us but I wish to remind them before you all talk big, go look at yourself in the mirror and go compare yourself to the angmos girls! Need I say more... To us "big is good."

Anyway recently this incident occurs. I was walking toward the library (yes I go to the library) entrance and a lady was approaching, so I opened the door for her. She just walked out, without uttering a word, stared at me as if I'm some kinda freak and walk off... Not even a word of thanks... Knn limpei not bellboy leh. You look at me untill like that for what? Wana tip me ah? This is not the first time that I've had this sort of experience, it had occurs ever so frequently. The number of girls who say thanks you are really few and far between. So girls go reflect on this. Go learn some manner or attend lesson on courtesy. Although such occurance had not deter me from being the gentleman in me. Maybe most guys had already being turned off and decided to stop doing it altogether. "Ccb this fat ugly pussy I open the door for you not even a word of gratitude. Hope you'll get stuck in the next exit."

So ladies please go look in the mirror, reflct reflect reflect before you go kaopei kaobu about us guys. Thank you very much. Maybe I should stop here before I start a war between Mars and Venus, if not mahta later come up with a new act to charge me... sexistion act maybe?

Friday, September 30, 2005

Ya... Finally got my all elusive driving license after months of painstaking, backbreaking labour. Years maybe considering the year I took my basic theory test... Ok I was only exaggerating bout the all the pain and hardwork and It only took bout 4 months of practical lessons =). Wasn't so difficult after all ya. So mission accomplish... Will now work towards improving on my Bs from my last exam.

Wednesday, September 21, 2005

Cinematoblog

Being an avid movie goer, the lack of good film to grace the silver screen recently has really got to me... Where have all the good movies gone? Is piracy really getting the heat outta Hollywood that all big productions and mega blockbuster are so few and far between these months? Did a check and found out that there is nothing much to anticipate for the rest of the year... sigh... A few did tickle my cinematic nerves a little but were slightly flawed.

1) Saw 2 - Prequel was release without much fanfare but the film turns out to be surprisingly well done. Great plot, surprising twist in the end. Was even compared with the critcally acclaim se7en starring Brad Pitt and Morgon Freeman. Sadly the things about sequels, especially those made to bank on the success of the former film tends to disappoint. Who can forget matrix relaoded and revolution, Infernal affairs (wu jian dao) 2 and 3, even Starwars... Hope I'll get it wrong this time.

2) Harry Potter and the goblet of fire - The 4th film adaptation of J.K. Rowling's Harry Potter novel. Never understood whats all the big deal about the nerdy boy wizard. The 1st 3 movie were only so so.

3) Doom - Based on the hugely succesful video game. It introduce the world to first person shooters paving the way for the likes of other widely popular video games such as half-life, halo and resident evil, but movie made outta video games often do not enjoy as much success as their counterpart. I personally prefer adoptions from comics or novels... Batman begins rocks! About video games films there's Resident evil... Save for the ending with Milla Jovovich showing the world her tits, nothing much to rave about. The rest of the show is all about her jumping and flipping everywhere shooting monsters... The end.... Oh yeah... high up on the list is of video games turn movie flop has to be Street Fighter with Jean Claude Van Damn! and introducing Kylie Minogue to the world of movies... She problably still can't get here movie debut outta her head... Well cause not much news of her from Tinseltown was heard of since. Anyway for video game fans, you can look forward to Slient hill as well. Enjoy.

4) King Kong - Directed by Peter Jackson (Lord of the rings). He should comprehend playing the title character or persuade his twin, Michael Moore (They look so alike.. haha) to don the ape suit. That way I'm sure they can save alot on production cost as little make-up need to be applied. Anyway this ape flick reminds me of Gozilla and The Incredible hulk, both which of cause suck big time. Lets see.



left - Peter Jackson during audition for the titled role. After all his monkeying around they decided to offer him the director's seat instead.
Center - Michael Moore also auditioned but was not considered as the studio decided that Kong should be black male... not blonde with boobs.
Right - The real McCoy.

Check out the next post for upcoming movie to be release in 2006.